Biggest Win In U.S. Soccer History?

ESPN has a new poll out asking that same question. With over 37,000 votes recorded an over whelming majority believe that this 1-nil win over Algeria is in fact the biggest win in U.S. mens soccer history. To be honest I really have to agree with this poll. Watching this match with my fellow soccer supporters, drinking beer at 7:00am, standing up and sitting down a thousand times, and knowing what a win would mean for this country was almost unbearable for 90+ min. But when Landon Donovan scored the only goal in the 91st min, all the stress left my body………in the form of a yell that made my throat so raw that it hurts to whisper even as I’m typing this post. This truly is an amazing day for U.S. soccer!!

I don’t really even feel bad for the Algerian team. Based on the way most of the players look I’m sure they are already headed to the nearest rave going on in South Africa. I actually read an article that said 12 players from the Algerian national team had traveled to South Africa with plenty of extra glow sticks, Ecstasy, pacifiers, and back up tight-fitting Algerian jerseys.

All in all well done U.S. Now bring on Ghana………rhea!!!!!

They be Ill’in

North Korea took a step into the 21st century and decided to broadcast the match against Portugal live for the entire nation to see.  In a country that has state run, sponsored, and monitor television, this move is unprecedented.  The pride that is felt throughout the country is incredible, so much so that the idea of having a “live” broadcast makes worldwide news.

Here’s how crazy the commies are:

1. Kim and his totalitarian leadership allow only one state-run TV channel, ban shortwave foreign radio broadcasts and restrict outside Internet access to the elite
2. In the past, only snippets of World Cup games were shown, sometimes weeks later.
3. In 2002 and 2006, a South Korean broadcaster relayed live video as part of reconciliation efforts with the wartime rival, but North Korea chose to show only tape-delayed parts of matches.
4. The broadcast was the first North Korean overseas match to air live back home

The national pride in this team swelled so much that they were willing to broadcast this match (through a South Korean signal) live for all to see.

“State TV made no attempt to conceal scenes of the crowd and sponsors’ ads plastered around the stadium.”  Pure craziness!!

Quote from a family member of the North Korean squad, “Watching the game live, I felt like I was in South Africa myself,” and that and seeing the outside world made him feel like Alice chasing the white rabbit.

At least they didn’t go overboard and let John Harkes do the color commentary.  They chose instead to let their own wit and charm take over, example:

“Our defenders didn’t see him unexpectedly coming out from behind,” the state TV commentator said. “They should have more awareness about those coming from behind.”

Amen brother. Sounds like an important life lesson as well.  Maybe he is better than Harkes.

After the pure destruction of the North Korean squad, and them knowing that their nation was watching live in this historical broadcast, I think the line up may be a little thin come Friday, and South Africa may just have increased their Korean population from 0 to 23 if you follow me.

A Letter To Lionel Messi

 

Dear Messi,

I just finished watching you play for team Argentina were you beat team Greece 2-nil. And I have to say that you really impressed me. Your first touch is absolutely amazing. Being that your only 23 years old and leading your country in the largest stage in the world is pretty incredible. This past season playing for Barcelona were you recorded 34 goals in league play. Man you are on the top of your game!

But Messi, I really have a bone to pick with you. You are only 23 years old and make over 9.5 million pounds a year from Barcelona. You travel all over the world and are loved by millions……..but seriously……what are you thinking with your hair?!?!?! Have you looked in a magazine or watched a movie? No one has a business in the front party in the back bowl cut anymore! You look like Jose Canseco in the 80’s when he played for the Oakland A’s and was doing forearm bumps with Mark McGwire. Do you drive a Trans Am? Do you wear a jean jacket? Do you peg your pants? Do you listen you Def leopard? Cause you look like you do!! When I look at your highlights it looks like I’m watching the episode of Knight Rider when David Hasselhoff had to play football to stop a drug lord from selling crack to inner city kids {Kit had to come and save the day once again….it was was pretty sweet!}.

But really I just wanted to write you this letter Messi, asking you to please change the hair. It really looks bad.

Your Friend,

Jacob

Au Revoir Caca Bouche

Nicolas Anelka was just kicked off the French World Cup squad yesterday for getting into a heated argument with French manager Raymond Domenech. Cry Baby Anelka has been reported to have verbally attacked Domenech and then refusing to apologize. This all was stemming from team France getting their asses handed to them by team Mexico.

First of all a part of me would want to lash our irrationally if I was humiliated by team Mexico. CBA {Cry Baby Anelka} has been under a lot of pressure since the lack of performance in some of Frances World Cup friendlies and in the opening match with Uruguay which ended in a nil nil finish.

Secondly are any of us really surprised by CBA’s actions? Who does he play for in the EPL? What type of player is able to look at his face in the mirror every morning and still play for Chelsea? That type of person is the same one that would get kicked off his own country’s national team, have the ego to verbally attack your boss, disgrace the beautiful game, and think he is in the right.

Monsieur Anelka, you are a douche!

Manchester United = Confederate Army

The American Civil War was a very brutal and disturbing time the U.S. This war saw the division of many towns, friends, and families. We read about the country being dividing into two; neighbors turning against neighbors, fathers turning against sons, and BROTHER turning against BROTHER.

The war came down to two different beliefs. The south: which stood for a way of thinking that dehumanized men, women, and children. They held themselves up as being greater than the rest of the land and greater than all those who did not appear to look like them. And the north: which stood for freedom, freedom for all mankind. Liberty and equality for all.

With the 2010-2011 season’s fixtures being released earlier in the week we see a repeat of history and of what we all have read before. Brother against brother as Newcastle United will face Manchester United on their opening day match. Newcastle United are from the north and are a club that play for the people and for all of mankind. Manchester United are from the south [at least south of Newcastle] and perceive themselves as being better than the rest, just like the southern states during that tragic period in American history.

So Sean…my brother…we will have to do battle my friend. I don’t want to but we must. So in ending this post I have one question for you………….Who won the Civil War?

WE DID!!!!!

A lesson on how to NOT referee another World Cup match.

I apologize, but I must vent and I am “slightly missed” as my colleague Jacob puts it.  If you want a lesson on how to referee your first and last World Cup match than there is none greater example than what I just witnessed in the US versus Slovenia match.

What a disaster!  A phantom call cost the US a vital win in the second group match.  I don’t want to focus on the first half debacle of a performance that the US decided to produce (even I called the subs that were going to be made), the second half was an outstanding performance and more than deserved that third goal.

This great performance was disgraced by a call that no one could explain.  Offsides? A foul in the box? Neither were apparent in the replay and even Donovan’s interview at the end described a moment of confusion that turns out to be pure madness.  I am definitely one to question a referee’s decision making ability on a minute by minute basis, that’s just the type of fan I am.  But to not even know the call was (still sort of unsure) is an absolute travesty.  That goal was meant to be.  The comeback was meant to be.

Chalk it up to a “rookie” mistake, but that match was definitely a lesson in how not to succeed in World Cup refereeing.

O, it’s so on!

2010-2011 Campaign preliminary fixtures have been released!  Among the Thugs has a cracker of a first day lined up:

Saturday, 14 August 2009

Aston Villa v West Ham
Blackburn v Everton
Blackpool v Wigan
Bolton v Fulham
Chelsea v West Brom
Liverpool v Arsenal
Man Utd v Newcastle
Sunderland v Birmingham
Tottenham v Man City
Wolverhampton v Stoke

We will post to discuss the rest of the schedule just as soon as we have a chance to breathe.  For the complete list from ESPN click here.

Vuvuzelas to the the EPL?

I love the EPL.  I have ever since I was little.  It is a close second to my family.  Just like your family there are very few things, or next to nothing, that will cause you to turn your back on it.

The Vuvuzela is one of those things.  This is the skeleton in your closet, your dirty little secret, or your hidden love for Chelsea, the thing that once discovered will cause you to be shunned by those you love.

In an alarming report released on ESPN today revealed that these horrible devices may be unleashed on the beloved EPL.  When I saw the headline I laughed out loud.  “Not in my beloved EPL! They would not stand for such things!”  Thinking this was a joke, I read on looking for a punch line.

I thought I found it when the article read, “Nothing in our rules specifically prohibits musical instruments from being brought into grounds as these matters are dealt with at a club level. It will be down to stadium managers, in consultation with supporters groups, to determine what is appropriate.”

Surely the fans would not stand for this.  That quote was our saving grace.  It cannot be possible, right?

Then I was hit with this realization, “One bookmaker is already taking bets on which Premier League club would be the first to sell vuvuzelas in their team’s colors.”

Marketing material, sponsorships, club logos, dear Lord they can make a profit off of this!  We are hosed EPL fans.  Prepare yourself for the buzzing on the tele, the 8 year-old behind you with the iron lungs going at it for 90 minutes, and most of all, be prepared to see your club logo on the side of that disaster of a noise making instrument.

You want to know the worst part?  Slap a Manchester United logo on one of those bad boys, and yes you will see it at my house, and in my lap on game day.

Villa’s in our blood, right Mr. Hanks?!

I would first like to apologize for my long absence from posting. My only excuse is that I was busy fighting Chelsea fans from luring young boys into their vans down by the river. I’d like to say I fought the good fight and saved every innocent child… I did not. Chelsea has proven again that money can buy you wins, players, and apparently pre-pubescent kiddos. But I digress, yes that is THE Tom Hanks holding up his villa scarf proudly. Even Tom Hanks swears by the mighty villains!! Tom Hanks is one of the most successful actors of our time. He is known for his movies BIG, CASTAWAY, and PHILADEPHIA where he won an academy award for his portrayal of a Chelsea fan, and what its long term effects can be.

I just wanted to say that Mr. Hanks has class, charm and good taste in football clubs. Villa is in our blood. Much like Newcastle gets in your blood from sharing needles or inter-species mating.

So all I have to say is…

UP WITH VILLA!!!

Glenn Beck Makes Me Laugh

I was reading an article on one of our footy friends http://www.epltalk.com/ and they had posted an article {http://www.epltalk.com/glenn-beck-hates-soccer-and-the-world-cup/20799#more-20799 } that I felt needed to be reposted in a way on our site. It’s about a conservative talk show host and Fox TV host here in the States named Glenn Beck. On his radio show he had a segment on the World Cup. He goes on for about two mins ripping soccer and ripping the World Cup. He compares the World Cup to the Obama administration {huge slap in the face} and basically says that no one here in the states really gives a crap about soccer.

Listen here:

Whats funny here is that he really has not done a lick of research on his topic. He really makes himself sound very foolish and really like a douche when the facts show that Americans really do like soccer and there is a growing interest in the sport {http://www.epltalk.com/how-popular-world-cup/20213 }.

Mr. Beck….get your facts straight and stop making an ass out of yourself!!

Thanks http://www.epltalk.com/ for the info and story! Love you guys!!